Today in mental health: there was much clearing of plates & scraping of cutlery.
Decided, last week, to keep a weather eye on the jobs report. In eight months I better be working somewhere else, or I'd better be in a position of barely working & commanding an army of smurfs. Baby needs these hands to draw.
Also came clean with Sig about a quickly faded crush. I met an artist, realized I doubted their motives, and didn't do the obvious thing when a cool individual wanted to smoke weed & hang in my studio, because I was too myopically focused on, dunno, being friends first. Consequently it was a bit of knock when they asked to "unsubscribe to my newsletter" i.e. go 'way boy, ya bother me.
Sketchy is as sketchy does, and sketchy didn't want to actually talk about making lines on paper.
Hey, I don't make friends easy. Never have. Fuck 'em. Or rather, don't. Because men are sluts. :3
Great part is my relationship with Sig is stronger than ever, plus I don't have some terminal flake humouring me & stringing me along w/ an eye on some unknown angle.
The only thing that matters as much to me as my husband is art, and I've had enough of friends who simply don't wanna talk art. That's most every friend I've had for the last decade...
As a weirdly influential, no-good canadian misanthrope once said, "Never fall in love with a bar."
And what of the o.g. crew, the peeps who were there when my alien spacecraft landed? They all fucked off to work for the evil empire & establish tax havens for Google in the UK (that was The Writer), or abandoned painting in favour of opening fad restaurants & scamming creditors (that was The First Artist), or abandoned drawing comix in favour of becoming a tenured poet at a prestigious college & marrying a zionist (The Second Artist + Art Partner), or fail to become an architect in San Franciso and do what, exactly? (He was more of the First Artist's friend, anyhow)... Etectera.
When 'they' say the people you meet in college will be your friends for the rest of your life, 'they' are spitting Recieved Wisdom, and speaking from a model of friendship that predates the bicentennial.
The point here is, my focus is refreshed, I am sober as Carrie Nation's little ax, and there is work to do, on every level. No more pretenses of authority or aspirations of fame or inclination to podcasting.
Shit gon' get done.
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