re-reading / up a tree

a good sign, when re-reading & you no longer see things to fix.  all the gaping wounds & obtrusive scar tissue have been elided and there is now a flow whereas before it was ALL roadwork, to my weary eyes

edits are coming to an end

i have of late been doing a lot of my editing in a tree.  this isn't gonna be one of those posts.  it feels good to climb a tree and sit and think.  i feel like i've re-discovered something.  i've always done a bit of climbing & perching, but it's been years time since i've felt confident enough to really Climb.  apparently i have the upper body strength for it, whereas in my youth-as-a-squirrel my arms were flabby & tremulous

also i have no fear.  which i keep noticing and wondering at--  it should bother me, or there should be some leeriness, some anxiety over imbalance, but i just look down with unarticulated certainty that i'm secure.  you'd think i haven't been afraid of climbing stairs or taking a tumble...  which i have, rather significantly, since cracking my skull.  i've had a veritble case of the Mortals ever since the skullcrack.  a stair without a banister spooks me.  and since my right knee started giving me grief i've been rather reliant on banisters.  but this tree climbing thing is instinctual, apparently, and does not strain the joints, somehow

maybe tree climbing reverses aging.  what's the harm in believing that?  don't answer

anyroad.  a photographer noticed me the other day and asked "why" and i didn't have an answer since it was an impulse.  but...  it's nice to be in a public place and people simply either take you for granted because you're not at eye level, ergo you're out of mind's reach, or when they do notice you, it's with a pleasurable envy.  that look that says "fuck, i wish i'd thought to climb up there".  it's a nice perch.  good shade.  great spot to think & read.  reading in a tree is the fuckin' best

my favourite tree at the moment, to be completely honest:  my editing suite

cue the endless edits & amendments & revisions

This phase of things shouldn't be too bad.  Usually, after completely scripting a book (Painless, Denizen, Azure Pantry), I'll go into reread & edit line by line; testing the rhythms of dialogue, the pace of exchange, and fix all the Real Obvious Fuckups.  Chop.  Fill in.  Until the thing has defined itself satisfactorily, when I really Hear the words spoken, without reading them aloud.  The persistent problem with this stage, I've found, is the abundance of really obvious mistakes spellcheck doesn't get-- where there's an automatic linefill, some kind of substitution situation where you didn't mangle the word, you just mistyped so the processor can't hang any red lace on it...  A completely nonsensical sentence will sit there for weeks of revision with a Bad Error which I can't see because my brain's glazed over with all the other work that must be attended to.  It's embarrassing and a real argument for having an independent editorial voice, a reader who isn't the author, but at this phase in my professional personality as an Artist I'm no longer interested in sharing unfinished work with others, and I certainly don't want to hear "I'm going to read it, I swear" used as an excuse by ANYone, let along a friend, so why put people through it?  I'm not using fucking AI to read my scripts, so it's down to me and my OCD to find all the goofs and fine-tune the troofs I wrote while wearing my SmArt Faggot hat.  I don't think this one's gonna be too much of a problem because if I fuck up continuity between chapters it's only going to enhance the final effect THE KILL HOUSE is going for.  Art house is where it's at, and aggressive unconcern with a reader's comfort only becomes more attractive to me as I grow ever further estranged from John & Karen Q. Public.  I like Refn movies with no dialogue, and 800-plus page books about imaginary cities written with the structural conceit of a geometrical puzzle, whose primary Plot is fucking and who does who where.  So this book shouldn't be any surprise to anyone familiar with my psyche.  It's more cluttered & up its own ass with theory than this blog.